Hi Nancy - Yes, Matthew died in the hallway of our home. Where his head was slumped forward, brownish pulmonary edema fluid drained from his mouth and left a stain on the carpet. It was 6 months before I cleaned the stain up. It was like a grave marker in our home, the very point where he died. And we have to go past that point many times, every day. I was by myself when I discovered Matthew's body (I am divorced). I thought I stayed pretty calm when I called 911, but then I called my mother next and she asked who it was, so I must have been more hysterical than I thought. This dreadful scene plays over and over in my mind.
I tried posting on some of the pro-methadone websites too, but they deleted them and banished me! My posts were not angry nor did I say that I thought all of the clinics should be shut down. I just suggested that patients should be more educated before they started this method of treatment, so they can make an educated decision. They need to see the positives and the risks/negatives. We were only presented the positive side of Methadone, even in the websites that I read, so never in my worst nightmare did I think this drug was so easily fatal. Of course, now that it is too late, I have learned so much about this unstable, lethal drug. It's frustating trying to make changes and simultaneously coping with the pain of losing our sons. Our legal case goes to mediation on June 10, we'll see what happens with that part of the legalities.
Love and prayers to you Nancy, Terri

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